That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
