While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
