They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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