I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.