Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
