wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
