I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize