I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize