I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Did I show you my penis last night?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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