So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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