I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
