How'd it feel making her break her religion?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize