How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
