Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
