I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
