Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
