Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
third nipple confirmed
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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