I need help removing her.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Randomize
