will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Randomize
