I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
