I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
