Dual....:-)
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
no you cant smoke seaweed
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
