dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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