who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize