do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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