When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
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there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
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Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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