Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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