I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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