that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
