Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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