Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Randomize
