69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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