That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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