We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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