I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize