real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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