And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
