Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
