but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
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