just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
