party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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