I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
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I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
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Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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