If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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