dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
