dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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