We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
