sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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