it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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