But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
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My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i drank out of a bidet.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
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Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
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