actually, I'm a sock model
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Acid is not a monday night drug
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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