I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Randomize